No Smoking Please

As most of you know, we are non-smokers. We don't have anyone in our families that smoke except for J's dad (Wy's Poppy) who does like to smoke the occasional cigar. He does not smoke in their house - only outdoors. I never really even thought to address what smoking was with Wy because HE IS ONLY 2...but apparently my perceptive little guy picked up on it.

The other day Wy had his straw from his juice box in his mouth. Every so often he would take it out and blow air.

Me: Wy, what are you doing?

Wy: 'Moking my gigar.

Excuse me? What did he just say? Let me make sure I heard him right...

Me: What did you say?

Wy: Louder and looking at me like I am the village idiot " 'MOKING MY GIGAR."

OK, so I immediately start thinking of the different ways I could respond. Do I lecture him about the dangers of smoking or just let it pass and hope he moves on to the next fad? I went with the latter and made a mental note to discuss this new found interest with the IL's i.e. thanks so much for teaching my son how to smoke.

This brings us to Tuesday. We were heading to Mother's Morning Out and I noticed Wy had his juice box straw in his mouth. We arrive and as I was putting on his socks and shoes (b/c I don't even bother putting them on before we leave b/c I got tired of doing the task twice) I ask him for the straw.

Wy hesitates and asks: Can I 'moke my gigar in the pway womb?

Me: Still working on the shoes, responds with "Do any of the other children smoke cigars in the playroom?"

Wy: No

Me: "That is because it is against the rules to smoke at school." Again, trying to keep it simple.

So Wy thinks about this for a minute and then asks "Can I 'moke my gigar outside? On the pway gwound?"

Wow - OK, this kid has an answer for everything. I am DONE discussing "moking gigars" with my 2 year old at this point and attempt to rationalize (I know, waste of time) with him by explaining to him that HE IS 2 YEARS OLD and you have to be "as old as a Poppy" to smoke. Ha - brilliant.

I silently prayed on our way in that 1) we wouldn't see someone "younger than a Poppy" smoking b/c then he would find me out and 2) that he doesn't bring up "mokin gigars" with Ms. Amy his teacher. I can just see his "Daily Report" comment: "Wyatt showed all the children in the class how to smoke cigars with the crayons. Please don't bring him back - ever."

You know, I just wasn't prepared to have this discussion yet - I had the whole smoking topic tucked away in the "uncomfortable teen conversation" category. That is the beauty of parenthood - just when you think you have it figured out, they throw you a curve ball...or a gigar.